You decide not to know. Once, way before you decided not to watch the news, you heard of a boy who had been abused by a teacher. The teacher had the support of some very important figures and he did not go to jail. Once, you saw as a mob of Ecuadoreans chased and threw stones to a group of Venezuelans. Why? You thought, where does all the hate come from? And you wished you were dead, but not only you, but all humanity. When is the next mass extinction? Because we need it.
A person told me that there are more good things than bad in this world, but it’s easier to focus in the bad. I’m not really sure about this. The news show everyday what is wrong with society. And if not the news, social networks are carrying news, real news, fake news, but most of it is terrible news.
Then you hear how irresponsible people are when they don’t watch the news, when they don’t know what’s going on with the world, and you wonder if you even belong to this world. And the thing is, why even be in the world if absolutely everything touches you? Your friend was crying because an asshole made her cry and you wanted to cry next to her, and it took all the effort of the world not to. You remember when a long time ago you read a blog of a girl who you didn’t even know, and you saw she had broken up with her boyfriend and you felt so much like crying that you thought there had to be something wrong with you. So, why do you feel so much? And then you think, again, that it would be better for the world to end.
Whenever you read a story about the polar bears starving or how global warming is in a no-return point you don’t fret anymore. All you think is that at least it will all be over soon. Maybe, soon, when there are no more humans, and wars, and animals that can be hunted, and anon hate on the internet, and rape, and fear, everything will be okay. But until all of that, it’s better not to know.
A not so quiet bower: musings and stories 